I don't think I've reached that point in my life where I'm necessarily disillusioned by the work environment or bored with the work that I do. However, I don't believe that I've reached the point in my life where I'm satisfied with where I'm at either, if that makes any sense. My boss told me today that I'm on an upward trajectory and ideally, I'd like to think so. There's a part of me that feels stagnant or complacent. I feel like I need to do something new or add something to my plate that will make me feel excited again or that will re-ignite my passions and interests. Not to say that I don't enjoy what I do... I just know that I am capable of doing more and the people around me constantly remind me of that.
I had my 1st annual performance appraisal last Thursday. It went extremely well. I received my appraisal, which closely resembled a report card for working adults. I was blessed enough to receive a generous raise as well as a glowing review by not only my 2 supervisors but also by the Dean of another department, who took time out of his day to write a lengthy email complimenting me and my work ethic.
"I always say that being nice is never good enough. Everyone expects great work. Anna produces great work and she does it with a smile on her face"
I was humbled by all their comments. However, my boss also brought up one of my major weaknesses and something that I plan to improve on in the upcoming year:
"My sense is that Anna does not know how good she is, so she often second-guesses herself on decisions that she could make on her own and that I would have no concerns with. I will work with her to develop that self-confidence... she is incredibly smart and has a great sense of what the department's goals are, so I will continue to encourage her to trust her instincts and make more decisions and suggestions"
I am in complete agreement with this statement and I'm sure my other bosses would agree. This is something I've struggled with my entire life. Growing up, I had gotten used to people telling me what to do and how to do it. I was taught to follow the rules and do exactly what I was told. I learned that there was a right way to do things and a wrong way and I guess I've carried over that mindset into my career, which can be both good and bad. I have to learn how to trust that I can run programs and events on my own without having to consult everyone around me. It's funny because over the summer while my boss was on maternity leave, I was on my own and I was fine. I guess when higher authority figures are around, I feel more inclined to seek their approval. I'll be sure to keep you updated on my progress. I was also told to watch "The Devil Wears Prada". I think I'll do that tonight. I love my boss, who seems to have my best interests in mind. I really do look up to her.
Anyway, just thought I'd break my month-long blogging hiatus. I'll try to blog more frequently. Hope you're all doing well.
Labels: goals, work
posted by anna liza at 3:56 PM