This is the result of withdrawals...
(sorry we couldn't find everyone's name)
Three creepy men took this picture.
Stay tuned for more installations of our 09 adventure on June 29 foo! :) hahah.

Yay! Mission or outing accomplished! <3'09! I would post pictures but that would take forever especially with my computer. Today 4/??ths of us second years (bc we're not first years anymore) had an awesome adventure around L.A. It was fun. We got lost, we laughed a lot, took many pictures, and hung out, no awkwardness whatsoever okay maybe a few moments but they lasted only seconds because then we'd start laughing about it. I'm too lazy to blog in detail. Ugh.

Okay yay highlights:
- Alex to the rescue
- Scenic route
- Taking pictures of Immac..."that's like a log tour spot"
- "I'm sorry I'm not a good driver"
- Mapquest itinerary
- Hollywood and Highland
- Big bird
- Stars
- Perverted pirate and goofy
- Being called "Maganda!"
- Toni's boyfriend
- Superman loves us
- Johnny Rocket's
- The grove
- Farmer's market
- waiting for a trolley because we were too lazy to walk
- myspace pictures!!!
- AMERICAN GIRL! our future workplace / birthday party site
- My best friend Peanut
- "Even the ketchup's happy that we're hanging out"
- Abby the navigator
- Lower!
- "I can't believe we're hanging out"
- Pink's
- "Why's it taking so long for your order? You're pretty girls"- a gross old guy
- "Ridin' dirty"- Chamillionaire
- "We're big...girls"
- "Really weirder"
- Next up, seaworld
- There's more... but I'll let Bellamay, Toni, and Abby blog about them.

Soo I'm really sad I can't go on Saturday. Happy early birthday to GP and Kirs this weekend! I'm going to Riverside at 9:30 tomorrow morning and then heading to San Diego on Saturday to see animals! Hooray! Then I'll be back in LA around noon on Sunday hopefully. I still have to pack up. So just in case I can't blog this weekend... I hope everyone has a safe fourth of July weekend. Thanks for today fellow 09'ers. I had a lot of fun! Penney, Bernie, and Kathy, among other second years were very missed! More pictures to come. This week has been nonstop. Next week will be more laid back I bet... YAY SUMMER. I love you!

This isn't really one of those "what I did today" kind of blogs I guess. It's funny how much you can learn from a person after spending just one afternoon with them. The earlier part of this evening was spent with me being sort of annoyed by the fact that plans were running late. Bellamay put up with my complaints online haha. I was kind of frustrated that our 5:00 dinner turned into 6:00 which turned into 7:00 because Heather was stuck in traffic. However, Gen picked me and Suzette up and we started our trip to where Heather was staying. Even though it was pretty near my house, we faced another problem because we couldn't find it...it was annoying. We ended up missing it by a block. Finally we saw her after 10 years of not seeing her! It was cool. We caught up and stuff. Good conversations. Interesting fact, she met Chamillionaire because he lives across the street from one of her friends. Anyway we get to Islands around 7:45 and we realize that if we wanted to watch the 8:10 showing of Click, we didn't have much time to eat. We ordered immediately and constantly looked at the clock to check the time while we were waiting and then we realized that even rushing through our meal wouldn't get us to the movies on time. Then after deciding not to watch it, we decided to watch the 9:40 showing anyway at the end of our meal. So we picked up Tracy and watched Click. Despite the bad reviews, we loooved it. It made me laugh and tear up too. Yeah I cried.

Okay so moving on from the superficial part of this entry, Heather and the movie made me (and Gen and Suzette too probably) think about the way we live our lives...so fast paced, never "in the moment", always fast forwarding through our day, never stopping to "smell the roses" or to enjoy ourselves and our company, rushing through the world to get to what appears to be a "pot of gold" but is in reality what the movie calls "cornflakes." And by doing so, we lose sight of what's important or what should be most important to us, like family and friends and just life in general. I remember calling Heather on the phone multiple times today to ask where she was, knowing that her response wouldn't change the circumstances and would definitely not speed up her arrival, as much as Gen and I would've wanted it to. Good things come to those who wait and patience has proven itself to be a virtue. Even though we bugged her too many times, she constantly apologized and said sorry...it was that southern hospitality (which is soooo awesome and admirable and amazing). We want to go to Texas or somewhere in the south just for that. Anyway, Heather made us realize how much we are dictated by the clock and the idea of "getting there" or getting to our destination rather than enjoying the journey to that destination. It's funny how true that is. From Gen yelling at traffic or bad drivers after specifically saying she was gonna drive nicely because Heather was here to us complaining about how long it takes the waitress to serve us food to us eating rapidly in hopes of catching an earlier showing of a movie just so that we can end our night earlier even though we have nothing else to do...we are kids trying to transform our light schedules into burdensome adult-like ones. Why do we need to fastforward? I don't know. That movie, which I didn't think much of before, is one of my favorite movies this summer, just because it totally related to our day and our experiences. Lots of the stories she told us today made us take another look at ourselves I guess. She told us about how guys in the south tip their hats at a girl when she passes by and says hello or good afternoon and some stand up out of courtesy. Guys also pay for everything, drive everywhere and open doors, pull out chairs...so chivalrous. And I remember my pet peeve about not letting guys open doors for me or do things for me in general and I guess it's pretty dumb. It's not like what they're doing is bad so why should I reject their acts of kindness? So she made me rethink THAT too. Her manners and overuse of "sorry" and "excuse me" and sayings like "ma'am"...made me, Gen, and Suzette look like jerks in comparison. We are pretty rude. She told us how she would try creating conversations with a couple of the cashiers or waiters in the stores here and the cold response or lack of response she'd get from some of them and I don't know... it makes you realize how we function here...not too much into the intimacy but more into the get what you want and go. So I guess what I'm saying is that I learned A LOT today and hopefully I don't forget what I learned and instead incorporate some of it into my own life before I start complaining and stuff again. Thanks Heather for hanging out with us today...even though we didn't expect it, we learned a lot from you. Thanks for teaching us how to "take it easy" literally :) Let's hang out again soon before you go back!

Gen: Aww I loved that movie! Were these dividers always here?
Me: Yes Gen, I think you're barely noticing them because you're actually slowing down and taking the time to look.

Gen: Hurry up and take the picture before we get shot.

Gen makes me laugh. I love living in LA...sometimes. It was so hot today. 100 degrees dude! UGH. On the way back from Glendale, Gen's dad called and said that the police were barricading her block/street because a gang was causing trouble or something around that area. Kingsley's the ghetto...hahah. So instead of going home, she's sleeping over Suzette's house which is across the street from my house. Jealous much? Probably not. Oh summer, expect the unexpected. How's that for long, Bellamay?! Take it easy yo. Praying for you!

P.S. Happy 19th Birthday Issa!! I miss hanging out with you. Hope you're having a good one.

P.P.S My mom told me that I lose hope too easily. I think she's right... even agreeing with that statement shows how easily I lose hope. Ugh. I gotta think positive and be optimistic and hopeful and trust in Him. He knows. I don't. Prayers please!

I have to continue my blogging roll. I feel like I have to pick up the slack for the bloggers who don't update all the time haha. Anyway, I'm losing track of the days/dates. I thought yesterday was Tuesday but it was only Monday. Time flies. My summer is flying by...I lost the first week to unproductivity. Boo. But this week has been good and it's only Tuesday! That means the rest of the week's gonna be awesome.

Yesterday I went with Gia, her cousins, Mike and Paul to Zuma Beach. I hadn't been there since September 16...for my cousin's birthday with the debut court. Okay I know this is going off on a tangent but it was the day before UCI Move-in day. I remember it so clearly. So many things happened that day/night. But I'll spare you the details. I spent the rest of that night packing up. Okay back to yesterday. Mike and Paul picked me up and we went to Mike's house where they played guitar hero for like 5 minutes and then we had to leave. Guitar Hero looks hard for left-handed people but it still looks fun. That song "Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf?" on Radio Disney is long and annoying. Gia's niece Caylynn is only 8 but she's so smart. We saw dolphins!! The water was really cold. We collected sand crabs. We went to the Santa Monica Pier and the promenade. We paid for parking using dimes and nickels (from Gia's coldstone tips) hahah . We ate dinner at Fatburger. The end. That's the shortened version. Now I am on facebook and myspace waiting for my mom to bring food for lunch from Bahay Kubo. Yummy! I'm gonna go out for dinner later with Gen and my old friend Heather who I haven't seen in 10 years. That should be fun. More things to look forward to this week like...watching Superman with Darlene, Gia, Theresa and them tomorrow, <3'09 outing on Thursday (sooo excited), sleepover at Riverside on Friday and San Diego Zoo/Wildlife Park on Saturday... What's sad is that it means that I can't go to that park/beach thing on Saturday :( I'm sorry!!! Okay that's my update. I apologize for how short it is. Praying for everyone!!! :D Bye!

It's hot. It really is. But my summer has finally started! Better late than never. I've watched a lot of tv lately. It's not bad though because it's not like I'm sitting in front of the tv the entire time, I've been sitting in front of the computer too... okay that's bad but this week it'll be different. I woke up at 11 again. I hope I gradually learn to sleep earlier so that I can wake up earlier.

Happy Birthday Meechy! Hope you have a wonderful day. You deserve it. Thank you for being a part of my life and for sharing your light with me :) You are awesome. I love you! AND thanks for inviting me to your party and for telling Trina to go because I hadn't seen her since September so that was cool too.

Maybe's almost always turn into yes's... Jack Johnson was wrong. I'm glad I got to see LOG on Saturday... the withdrawals are still there but they were temporarily relieved I guess haha. It definitely marked the start of my summer because up till then, I was kind of bored. I still miss you guys but Saturday made up for it!...except for my fellow 2nd years (see I'm not in denial). I can't wait till we hang out this week. Yay! I'm excited. Yay for indecisiveness, enthusiasm, awkwardness and adventures! :)

Yesterday after mass at the cathedral, my family and I ate at CPK and then watched Over the Hedge... hahaha. I liked it. But that's just me...and no I didn't choose the movie, my mom did. There's a squirrel (played by the guy who played the 40 yr old virgin) and he was obsessed with cookies. You should watch it just for that! Or maybe not. Then I went shopping. I need a job. I really do. I hope I get one soon... until then I'll keep trying. But I'll be satisfied as long as I get either that or my license this summer because those are my two main goals. Prayers please. I'm praying for YOU... praying that you get through the challenges that life may be presenting to you right now, praying that your faith in Him grows even more through the tough times (that's what Cardinal Mahoney's homily was about yesterday), and praying that you find strength in Him, in yourself and in your loved ones.

I thought I escaped the teasing at school but my brother continues it. yay. I don't know if I'd survive without a sibling though because I really am too reliant on talking to people. I'd probably be talking to myself if I had no one else to talk to. But what's weird is that I'm not good at using the phone to talk to people. Yesterday I had to call a couple of my friends to ask them something and I didn't want to do it at first but I did it anyway. It makes me wonder how I could've possibly talked to one person for 3 hours straight during middle school...or 3 way calling! when our days revolved around doing that because it was cool. I need to get used to the phone again... maybe that's also why I'm so bad at answering it.

This has been a random entry but all my summer entries have been random so far. I haven't been feeling reflective lately. I'm sorry. But I'm gonna eat lunch now. I miss you! Hope to see you soon. P's and NP's hahaha. Sincerely, Anna

P.S. Thanks Melissa for telling me about Kevin leaving backstreet. At least I know that I went to the last ever bsb concert in life! And thanks Adrian for taking me to Meechy's. It was much appreciated. And thank YOU for reading.

I've been awake since 8:00am! If that isn't considered productive, then I don't know what is.


I feel accomplished...just a bit.


Summer is turning around for the better! YAY! I knew you wouldn't disappoint me.


Yes! The shortest blog entry ever. I'm sorry it's short. I'll make it up someday.


Edited@6:43pm... Unlike SOME people who are either too busy or too cool to blog, I'm willing to blog TWO times in one day. You should follow my example and give me something to read in the process please, ok thanks! I'll be expecting thorough and detailed recaps of people's summers so far... actually I know not to expect that much but at least blog to let people know you're still here and alive haha. Thanks GP for letting me know about the progress of finding a cure for peanut allergies... I don't think I'd agree to be a subject for that experiment...not being able to breathe everyday and purposely submitting myself to allergic reactions that could possibly kill me? no thanks but I'm glad other kids are willing to do it under the supervision of doctors of course. Okay random subject change, I think I've become too reliant on the computer, especially as a means for communication... It's gotten to that point where I've memorized people's screennames but not their phone numbers. I'm convincing my parents to let us get out of this AOL dialup thing. I hate dialup. I get disconnected like at least 5 times in one day or multiple times during an hour. I still am attached to my old AOL screenname though. It's really lame, that's why I'll never share it even though most of my old friends know it. I've had it since the 6th grade. Wow 6th grade. Tomorrow my friend Heather is visiting from Texas. I haven't seen her since I was 9 or 10! That was in the 3rd grade. I'm excited. I'm excited for next week... it seems like it's gonna be way more eventful than this week! Alright, enjoy that update... because this is probably gonna be one of the only newly updated blogs that you can read right now... and whose fault is that? hahaha jk. Enjoy the weekend! TGIF.

annanymouslizard: man last summer was WAY better than this one
annanymouslizard: well so far
X HeAvYaRmZ X0: youve only been out for a week anna

Yeah, I guess I'm making this too big of a deal. I mean, last year my summer started on June 3rd and ended on September 17th...such a long but packed summer. I shouldn't be expecting too much because I wasn't expecting anything last year and it was awesome. So for now, I'll just take things one day at a time. I think I've finally hit THE summer when you make the realization that you're not a kid anymore. I can't run away from things like I used to. If anything, I'm forced to confront all the things that I need to do. I can't just get by with unproductivity like I did before. When you're a kid all you need to survive the summer is your friends, the sun, and television. Now I can't even look at summer the same way because there are things to actually do! It's sad...sort of. I reread some of my old entries from last summer and I'm jealous of my 18 year old self...kinda. Like last year, Gia and I did the whole job hunting thing together but this year I had to do it on my own. I wish she lived in LA still... I miss our spontaneous adventures. There were times when we'd hang out for 2 weeks straight, every single day! What happened?! Oh yeah...life. At least I get to spend time with my brother? hahah. Yesterday at the mall, I ran into like 4 Immac people and one of my old classmates from elementary. It was weird. I had lunch with Steph and Mimi at In N Out where Nikki was working. Then I passed by Express and saw Gaby. Then Alex said he saw some guy who looked like a potential molester... he could've been one. He had wandering eyes. He was loitering by an empty cart and opening and closing the drawers waiting for some unsuspecting kid, who is naive enough to talk to strangers, to come along. But I hope that this idea was just a product of our overactive imaginations because I'd hate it if it were true. When we walked out of Mervyn's, on our way to In N Out, this man was waiting by the door handing out "Ask Jesus to Save You" flyers. He was about to give my brother one but we dodged him. When we came back after eating, he was still there and he told my brother, "keep your head up, you'll be saved... I don't know about her (referring to me)." Apparently only men can be saved. It was weird. Then at Bath and Body Works, some old lady grabbed my brother's arm, calling him "nieto." HAHA He gets mistaken for hispanic too I guess. What an awkward series of events.

I need to get on top of things. Today I cleaned. Being at home = chores. At least it gives me something to do. I can't wait for things to start happening like when I get that thing that I need to get before the end of summer. Yeah, that'll be cool.

HAHA. Look! It's a picture of me holding a cookie! Yummy. Speaking of cookies, I had a Mrs. Field's cookie over the weekend. yay. It's my brother's turn to use the computer because I use it too much apparently but he's busy watching some movie so I decided to blog haha. Too bad for him. Whatever. Thanks for the invitations friends! It sucks that some dates conflict but what can you do? Dilemma and awkwardness. I still have to make a decision. Ugh. Yay vague entries. It is very hot. I don't enjoy it much. This is gonna be a short entry because I have nothing to say really. I've been averaging like 11 hours of sleep lately but I've been sleeping at 1-2... so you figure it out. My mom says my sleeping habits are bad because I'm sleeping in the morning and waking up in the afternoon. I'm still running on my dorm nocturnal schedule. Oh well. I'll try and get better at sleeping... because I guess there's a right way of sleeping. Gia has drywall termites at her apartment... GROSS!! does that mean she's gonna have to stay in LA now? I hope so haha. Not that I don't like her staying at West Co. but if she's in LA more often, we can hang out like old times. I miss old times. I lost my phone charger last night but I found it when I woke up this afternoon... because I mysteriously woke up around 1. HAHAHAH. My friend Andrew told me that I had to pay a fine to him for every minute I stayed up past 12 last night...little does he know how long I stayed up. Being at home means more people bossing me around. That's not fun. I think I'm gonna clean my room now. I have a lot of other goals this summer that I don't want to share because what if I don't accomplish those goals? I don't want to say something and then not do it so I'll just leave it at that. I wish I didn't have to do anything at all this summer but then I'm kind of glad that I do have stuff to do because everyone else seems busy. Maybe I should've taken summer school? Or not. Things to look forward to: Milk&cookies/movie night and shopping with Gia, Trina, and Kayla, dinners with Kim, metro/bus adventures with Diana and Margie, San Diego Wildlife Park/Zoo with Darlene, Theresa, Gia, RJ, Danny and Mike, Cranium at Joey's haha, seeing ring sister Kristina and Annie, Chinatown/Downtown shopping with Kathy, a day at Ate Princess's with Alex, Andrew and Kevin, Degrassi!!! on August 13th with Gia and everyone else who wants to go, hanging out with the "coolest first years everrrr", hanging out with Irvine people if I ever get to! hahah jk, Kirs' bday party, cousin outing, and more! Yay summer! This was a pointless post. P.S. GP, I do read all of the entry. The end.

TM pinay G I A: yaaay anna's back in la!!

It is 12:40am and my parents are sleeping. How I miss my dorm already. I really do. But even though I miss Irvine a lot, I like being home and getting fed actual food. I got excited when my mom cooked lumpia for me for a late lunch/appetizer.

I haven't blogged in a while. I'm sorry. It's summer and I think I'm starting to get even lazier. I'll try keeping up with the entries I guess...hopefully. I'd post pictures but I'm dealing with a 56k modem. The past couple of days have been crazy and hectic. I am now officially a second year! It's bittersweet. I'm gonna miss being a freshman...kinda. Ugh pictures would be a better way of capturing how I'm feeling right now but BOOO to my slow computer.

Wow I really don't feel like talking. I don't know if it's sleep deprivation or lack of inspiration or just sadness. I'll just start going on tangents to "get my creative juices flowing." Yeah. I'm that bored. Remember how I wanted to be bored earlier this week? I kind of take it back haha. So late night dinners at pippin this week were fun. I think I just went to late night to hang out instead of to eat. Good company, not necessarily good food (i.e. the yucky orange chicken). My last two meals at UCI as a freshmen consisted of Brandywine onion rings and Commons shrimp. Yeah I know that it wasn't necessary to share that information. I spent a majority of Tuesday and Thursday studying. Fun! Yay at least finals are over! YAY SUMMER...where is my enthusiasm?!

Last night was depressing. It really was. While everyone in my hall was packing up and stuff, Avi and I had to study for Brain Dysfunction. As if that wasn't great enough, Bernie left last night so when I got back from late night her side of the room was completely bare and empty. I felt emo especially when we had to say "goodbye" to each other! :( So lonely. Then when I did get back, I started taking my stuff down and I read my "yearbook." "Kawawa" lol. Thanks for calling/texting me Dumo and Dean! I probably wouldn't have waken up in time for my final if you guys didn't do that because I was seriously deep asleep. I didn't even wake up when my alarm rang! Weird. Oh well.

Goodbyes are not fun even if they are really just "see you later's". I miss my roomie, my vistan hallmates, my RA, my LOG family, and all my Irvine friends. I get reminded of them by a lot of things. Like today when my family went to Thai BBQ we passed by a "Vista Paint" store and I'm listening to my brother's new iPod (that he got for graduation) and it's on shuffle and it started playing "Off the Wall". WHY?! I'm also kinda bummed that I didn't get to see Gia, Darlene, and Theresa today because who knew there was so much hassle involved in moving out?! My mom got here at 1:30 but we ended up leaving for home around 4. We stopped by Cha For Tea too... I guess that explains it. First to move in, last to leave (well between me and Bernie) haha. Embarrassing moment today: "How did you even get in here?" Umm...so much traffic going back home and it was so hot. Ugh.

Congratulations class of 06 graduates!! I love you and I miss you. I hope the balloons didn't pop. We tried to match the colors with your school tassle colors but we only knew like a couple of them AND abby and I got insulted by the balloon lady. She said we weren't helpful. Ok that was me digressing but anyway I wish I was there to see you guys graduate or at least be in the same city as you. That sucks. But it's okay. I'm cheering for you in spirit. Thank you for teaching me so much this year and for helping me grow! Thanks for allowing me to be a part of your lives and thanks for being a HUGE part of mine. I have no idea what I would've done without you this year. Thanks for all your smiles, laughter, advice, hello's, jokes, and even teasing AND most especially for the trust. You're such an admirable, spirited, and inspiring group of people...heroes for sure, imperfections and all! ;) Thank you for defining cool....HAHAH. I believe in you! Good luck in whatever you choose to do and please go to the meetings next year ...DEFINITELY? Yes. I'm praying for you always.

kid, you'll move mountains.

This entry is making me sad... just a little. But the randomness is starting to overshadow the sad parts of it.

I MISS YOU...even more than I thought I would I guess. It'll be weird not seeing you guys everyday. I hope you have a fun summer! It is now 1:29am. It usually doesn't take me that long to blog but today's an exception I guess. I'm tired.

Three and a half hours until I take my last HumCore final which I haven't even studied as much for and four hours of sleep make a very unhappy person. I am stressed but apathetic but anxious. How can I be anxious and apathetic? I don't know. I need prayers for today. I have non-stop writing finals from 1:30-6. When am I gonna eat?! UGH! That is all.

Thanks for giving me the opportunity to get to know you. You're cool.

I love late night conversations...even though the time used on them could've been used on studying but it was worth it.

Yay for trust.

I'm tired. I can't wait to finish my finals today!

Finals week stresses me out.

I'm gonna move out in like 2 days!
HOW CRAZY IS THAT?!

I'm not ready.

But sometimes I feel like I am.

I should stop blogging and study more.

Where did this sunny weather come from?!

Kathy said my last post was like a stream of consciousness...wait until she reads this one.

P.S. I'm sorry it sucks!

AWKWARDDDD. I had a delightful weekend. Thank you for asking and caring. On Sunday I went to noon mass with Bernie. It was cool. I'm gonna miss going to mass at Interfaith over the summer and seeing familiar faces all the time. Afterwards, Bernie and Toni convinced me to spend the rest of my afternoon at Chuck E. Cheese's with the rest of log, who are older than me. Cool! I loved it. I really needed that study break. I thought my hip hop cinema final was today but I was wrong. It's on Wednesday, along with my Humcore final. I am scared for my life. Ugh. But eating yummy pizza, watching lame music videos, playing fun games, taking weird pictures, winning prizes like the slimy hand thing (my favorite toy ever), playing on the playplace meant for kids like half of my size, and hanging out with the older LOGger's = priceless (awww how pathetic) hahah. Look how happy I am in that picture. WOW. I am so dumb and lame. Yay Chuck E. Cheese. I said hi to him/her... I'm as tall as whoever plays Chuck E. Cheese. That sucks, especially since I thought he looked really big and intimidating when I was a kid. In summary, it was fun. Thanks noon mass choir especially Janice and Mel for letting me tag along. Afterwards, I went home and studied a tiny bit then it was off to Pippins for late night. "Where do you live? Harrowdale" HAHAH That scared me AND made me laugh. Pancakes! Building walls, etc. Today I woke up, ate lunch at Commons with Avi, then I went to Hip Hop Cinema review session with Kirs Erwin and Joe. Sweet! lol. I laughed A LOT in that class too. One of the girls in our group epitomized awkwardness and that made her cool lol, well to me. I'm getting really sleepy. Anyway, after that we went to Cornerstone. Thanks for the roundabout sandwich family leaders! Then we watched American Me at the library. GROSS & SICK (x3 as Kirs would've said). But it was a very not boring movie. Then I studied more at my dorm and walked over to Pippins by myself again...or at least I was until Joe and Dean told me to wait by the flagpoles and made me wave my hands like crazy and made me look dumb. Thanks. Ice cream late night at Pippins with like 30 (29 to be exact) people from LOG. New World Order, Degeneration X, "suck it". Yeah. I should think before I speak. I have been reading since I got back. I am incredibly sleepy. I think I will sleep now and wake up bright and early tomorrow for some more hardcore study time. I just thought I'd give you something to read for now. T.C.C.I.C

P.S. for 17733644? did I spell that right? Anyway, 74217155 for 12317711701176 me about 6FX. Yeah combination pager code and non-pager code because I forgot certain letters as numerics. Whoa numerics. haha. Whatever. I'm tired. Bye! Good luck studying. Prayers for everyone this week! I know I need them as well. But I feel His presence, most definitely.

I started moving things out of my dorm today. It's gradually becoming more and more spacious. I left some stuff in my drawers and I left my comforter and my wall of pictures. But it's starting to look depressing. Here's the before and after:

Crazy! As you can see, I kept some of the stuff because I think I'd get sad if I didn't, especially since I'm gonna be here till the end end...like Friday. Speaking of sad, when I got back to Irvine this afternoon, Bernie told me that the breadsticks that we got at Pat and Oscar's last night were stolen. The box was overflowing with breadsticks last night and now there's just 3 left. Ugh. It sucks especially since we had our names on it so they didn't even have the decency to leave the breadsticks alone even though they knew who the box belonged to. I hope they feel incredibly guilty. Some people can be mean. That's something I've learned. Recently I learned that not everything works out in the long run... you gain some friends while you lose others. Even though you desperately try to hang on to some friendships, sometimes the inevitable happens and you just drift apart. But what hurts even more is when you make the effort to at least be nice and decent and that effort just gets completely ignored or rejected. Why do we even try sometimes? Oh yes, the golden rule. I have to constantly remind myself about it. It just makes me sad. Yeah, that's all.

If you ever happen to read this, I'm sorry. It's been so long that I've forgotten when it all started or how it all started. The details have become blurry. Maybe that's a sign of maturity or a sign of forgiveness or maybe it's just being completely ignorant about the past. I know that I still feel bad and that I miss how things used to be once in a while. There was never really any end to the friendship and I'm glad about that. It feels like we made this unspoken pact to just go our own ways but I hope that you're happy and that He blesses you with many more wonderful birthdays to come. I hope you're surrounded by all your loved ones today and that you know that people are thinking of you! Praying for you always.

That made me feel a little better. I didn't get any studying done today :( But I'm glad I got to spend time with family! Today I had the weirdest but coolest conversation with my dad. Yes, he is that uncle... the token drunk uncle at family parties who talks A LOT and forces the older and even sometimes younger cousins to drink with the rest of the uncles. I love him anyway. He made me laugh. Thanks Dad even though you don't read blogs lol. Thanks Mom for listening to my stories and putting up with me all the time. Thanks Alex for I don't know but I know you do a lot for me, like lug my stuff back home and call me on the phone just so I can hear "Seasons of Love" HAHAHA... there's more but I'm proud of you. You probably don't read this either hahah (he chooses not to). Anyway, I appreciate my family more and more everyday! I'm kind of excited to spend more time with them during the summer and I'm especially excited to spend more time with you! yes you! The people who I haven't seen in a while and the people who I've seen everyday. Yay summer! I got to see Gen and Franny Jo today. Awesome. My cousin and I, though we are pretty different, we're pretty similar... lots of laughs ALL THE TIME. We were such weird kids and we are such weird teenagers/ young adults (what's calstate lb's mascot? the beach? blue steel? nowhere to go ..., awkward, "I haven't smelled my stuff in a while", dropping ice cubes, etc). I love friendships, especially the ones where you can just pick up right where you left off and there's no awkwardness. It's just the same old thing over and over again and it gets even better with time. Thanks for long time friends like Gen and Gia who keep me sane (14 years & 11 years and going).

I think I'm gonna study now or something. It sounds like a plan.

I like this posting pictures thing. It is the most AWESOME thing ever... I was about to say invention but I stopped myself hahah.

P.S. The evidence... find the culprit and beat him/them up afterwards.

Granted, Bernie ate some of the half bitten pieces but imagine like 10 breadsticks inside that box originally. UGH. Boo to whoever ate our breadsticks. You are meanies times a million.

erwinandfire04 (12:26:28 AM): dude whoever stole anna and bernie's breadsticks
spencerchild6 (12:26:32 AM): dude!
erwinandfire04 (12:26:32 AM): we must kill them
spencerchild6 (12:26:35 AM): Im down

With that being said, good night!

"the sun is over the city but it's an orange day / there is reason for looking up but I'm feeling down..."bsb
Bernie and I were nerds tonight and took pictures of ourselves in our dorm room because I'm gonna start packing up and moving stuff out tomorrow since I'm going home for my brother's graduation party at QQ in Glendale. Wow that was a long sentence. But yes. The picture on the left is the happy Anna! She is excited about being a second year, but not really. She's happy that she got to live in Vista for the year and is content with her freshman year experience. Why am I talking in third person?! I have no clue. Anyway, I'm extremely tired. I stayed up till 3 last night because I was finishing up my revisions for my dumb humcore research paper! My last paper of the entire year! All 10 pages of it! I had to cut stuff out of it. Whatever. Even though I am SO worn out and stressed and even though a bug bit me on my neck haha, I can't thank Him enough for the blessings that bring a smile to my face every single day. Your smiles, laughter, jokes, compliments, and words of encouragement all make the remaining days of my freshman year a little more bearable. I am officially done with all of my freshman year classes. All I have left are the finals. To be honest, I'm happy that my finals are so spread out that I can stay in my dorm a little longer BUT I'm sad because I feel like I won't be able to hang out with people next week because I'll be cooped up in my room studying. I won't let that happen. I need to go to late night at Pippins and stuff. I want to soak up as much time as I can with friends before I go back home for the summer! The past couple of days have been cool. Yesterday Penney and I were "bad" and sacrificed 2 hours of our studying time to see Angie and Kathy perform at their PCN Skit Improv Show/Concert. It was worth it. Penney, we're in! haha. Tonight, I went with Frances, Kirs, Erwin, Joe, and Brenton to Blends/Buffalo exchange... I didn't get anything, as usual hahah. Thanks for offering though. Umm...then we went to Pat N Oscar's with the seniors + Bernie, Kirs, Krystle, Brenton, and Matt for some really good food. How cool! we hung out with our heroes hahah. Then we went to Starbuck's and got kicked out. They dropped us off and now Bernie and I are planning to sleep early and I'm planning to pack up. I don't want to pack yet. It makes everything so real...it makes the end of freshman year SO REAL. I don't want it to end even though I want the school work to end like right now. Insert Anna's emo picture! HAHAH It's so gross but it's funny.

I've been thinking about how powerful He is. He is powerful enough to turn nothing into something. We say we are nothing, we recognize that we are human and that we are flawed but He turns us into something. All the people that I've encountered this year first began as nothing... not that they weren't important to me but when I first met them, I thought nothing of it, they were acquaintances and that was the end of it. However, because of Him, they've gradually become somethings and someones to me whom I can't imagine living without. Thank You for bringing these friendships into my life and I know that even though this is the end of one chapter or maybe even just one page in my life, this is just the beginning of these friendships... they don't end when the chapter ends.

Well starting here my life begins / starting now I'm learning fast / courage see me through / heart I'm trusting you / on this journey to the past
HAHA. Thanks for getting this song stuck in my head Angie.

One more week of UCI and then it's back home for me.
It'll be different.
I know it will.
But that doesn't necessarily mean that it has to be a bad thing...
Choosing to think positively.

Have a good weekend everyone! Happy studying! :)

So I wrote a really long post earlier but blogger wasn't working so I lost it. UGH. It was good too. Oh well, this one will have to do. It's been one year and a couple of days since I graduated and although I've changed quite a bit, I still ended both journeys (my senior year of high school and my freshman year of college) in tears.

This entry was written on March 16, 2006... I never posted it because I felt like it was too corny and lame but considering the affirmations and emotions from last night, I decided to post it anyway:

"God works in mysterious ways. The sadness that I experienced this morning has been replaced by this deep gratitude that I can't explain. The feeling that I belong somewhere again... it's an irreplaceable and remarkable one. For Him to bless me with another family after leaving the other one (IH)... it's a measure of His unconditional love. I'm convinced that He knows what I need. He's the only one who can fill my hunger and make me whole again. The past couple of months have involved so much transitioning and letting go. I was feeling so bogged down by my homesickness that I couldn't see the gifts that He was presenting me with. I didn't accept them immediately. My hall, my log family, my RA, my roommate...they are those gifts. I've changed so much because of all the blessings and people that have been in my life. I don't know how to capture this feeling in words, but I'll try. During the last couple of log meetings, I felt at peace. I really felt like I was a part of that family that I had previously been looking at from the outside or at least I felt like I was looking at them from the outside. This is how it feels like to be on the inside...to be accepted for who you are. All of them make me feel like I'm part of something bigger... something beyond myself. I don't exactly know what role I play in all this but I know that I do have one and it's amazing. I wish that everyone could find the sort of peace that these people have provided for me in college and I only hope to grow in faith with them or achieve at least half of the enormous faith that they all have demonstrated. I first saw them during mass at the plaza and I remember thinking, wow that's a close-knit group of people. But never once did I believe that I could fit into that group, that family. In a matter of months, I feel as though I'm their little sister and their friend. It's a wonderful feeling and I never really stopped to reflect on it until now. God is sooo good. I'm sure I'm going to continue to grow in my faith journey from now on..."

Told you it was corny. But AHHH!!! last night was yet another testament of the love and the growth that I've experienced from just one year in LOG. Thank you for teaching me how to love, serve, and live in Him and that's an all-encompassing "you" because all of you have literally helped me grow this year. Thank you for holding up a mirror and showing me how you see Him in me and how I'm a reflection of Him, as difficult as it is for me to see it on my own. Thank you for allowing me to share how I see Him in you and for giving me the opportunity to tell you how much you've touched my life. This is not a goodbye. It better not be, "hopefully" I HATE THAT WORD. Anyway, "words can't express what you mean to me, even though you're gone we're still a team" HAHAH yes I had to end it that way.

Today was IH's 100th commencement graduation ceremony stuff. I missed it! Congratulations to the newest IH alumnae, the class of 2006. I'm proud of you "women of great heart and right conscience" HAHAHA. Dude, there's more of them coming to Irvine next year! Yay. Anyway I bet I would've cried if I went... especially when they sang the alma mater! OMG. My brother even went this year to cheer on his friends. Apparently a lot of my fellow 05'ers were there. I miss you!! :( I was there in spirit!


I barely found out how to insert pictures into my blog! Cool huh? I know. Anyway today was good even though I was so tired from last night. I slept at 3 and woke up around 8:30 for my full day of classes until 6 or something. Then Erwin, Kirs, Joe, and I went to get our studying stuff, then we went to Starbucks and met up with Angie and then we ate dinner at O.K/Gina's. (Thanks Frances Fqa for bringing me my flashdrive thing :D). Then we went to the library to study and work on essays. There was some guy wearing a neon green shirt who kept making weird and funny cough noises. Upon leaving the library when it was closing at like 11, the doors that make sounds if you steal a library book went off on me because I had books in my bag from other libraries. THAT was awkward and kind of embarrassing but not really. I mean, am I the kind of person who would steal a library book? I didn't think so.

So that's all of my stories for today. Not too fun huh? Tomorrow is revise my rough draft and finish that stupid 8-10 page humcore essay day! YAY! I'm gonna sleep before 1 tonight. I need to. Good night!

P.S.
I love you
:)

HAHAH yuck but I mean it.

This was one of the songs they sang at graduation this year. My brother called me to let me listen to it. AHAHHAHA. Anyway I LOVE IT:

525,600 minutes,
525,000 moments so dear.
525,600 minutes - how do you measure, measure a year?
In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee.
In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife.
In 525,600 minutes - how do you measure a year in the life?
How about love?
How about love?
How about love?
Measure in love.
Seasons of love.
525,600 minutes!
525,000 journeys to plan.
525,600 minutes - how can you measure the life of a woman or man?
In truths that she learned, or in times that he cried.
In bridges he burned, or the way that she died.
It's time now to sing out, tho the story never ends
let's celebrate remember a year in the life of friends.
Remember the love!
Remember the love!
Remember the love!
Measure in love.
Seasons of love!
Seasons of love.

I'm feeling sad now. Our refrigerator and microwave have made their trips back to their respective places. Our dorm is beginning to feel less and less like home now. The end is near....
That reminds me of that church song, "Canticle of the Turning"..."Wipe away all tears for the dawn draws near / and the world is about to turn."

I don't know who said it tonight but someone said that in 9 days we're no longer going to be first years. That makes me feel... like I don't know, emo! ugh haha. I'm gonna miss everything. I'm so grateful to have met the people that I've been privileged enough to actually call my friends this year. How do you adjust from being a first year to being a second year? It seems like an unappealing transition that we all unfortunately have to go through at some point.

My first LOG spring banquet was SOOO awesome, even though I was really nervous about emcee'ing especially since my co-emcee Penney is sooooo goood like unbelievably and I'm sooo awkward hahaha. And I was nervous about our surprise presentation too. I'm glad it all worked out in the end. It's all for Him and the seniors that we were celebrating because we all see Him in you. Seniors, I'm really gonna miss you! Even though we still have practically a week or so left of school and even though you say that you "might" make it to next year's meetings "hopefully", I know it's not going to be the same. Thank you for welcoming us and embracing us this year and for taking us under your wings. The faith that you have in us is something that I cannot grasp at all. Your compliments and simple recognition of our potential... though seem simple to you, mean the world to us, I know they mean the world to me and we meant everything we said in that rap fo'sho.

You know we love you so / we'll never let you go / we wrote this song (actually Kanye did) just so you know / no matter where you go our love is true.

Thank you "Mama" Angie, secretively secret fellow panda Meechy, awkward Kathee, hero Joe, governor Dean, Cressa, Marites, Rhona, Kaylene and all the other seniors whom I've never gotten the privilege to know but who truly embody the light of God. I hope you enjoyed your special day and your surprises. Thank you all my log brothers and sisters whom I learn from everyday! Thanks for leading us closer to Him through you. I love you guys! My fellow first years, I'm proud of you. Thanks for giving me confidence and boosting my spirits when I'm down. We got this!

Yeah so how fitting is the fortune I got from Hop Li earlier today when I ate with my family:
"We must always have old memories and young hopes."

It's a coincidence that I witnessed two endings of two different chapters of life today in my brother's graduation from high school and in the Spring Banquet in honor of the graduating college seniors. Weird.

I guess saying "so this is awkward" makes the moment awkward. Booo. I'm gonna say it anyway.

So I'm really gonna sleep now. It's late and I'm looking forward to sleeping in (and then doing homework of course). Prayers for everyone. I hope I can write 5 pages more of that essay. But you know what?! I don't regret the sacrifice because Spring Banquet > finishing my humcore rough draft on time. Another thing I learned from the seniors and actually all the older students... the skill of procrastination. I will master, if not conquer, it.

I don't know why I'm feeling so emo. UGH.

edit! @ 9:06pm
So I really wanted to go to Island's today to celebrate Rica's confirmation but I have 2 more pages of my rough draft to write and Bernie was a good influence on me and said it would be better to stay home so here I am, thinking about cheddar fries and tiki tenders while staring at the blank 7th page. I just realized that if Bernie wasn't there to answer for me, I would've gone. I need some backbone. At least I said no or she said no for me. So yeah I'm feeling hungry. Wow. This is cool. I hope I finish at 11 so that I can get some good night's sleep. Thanks for taking us home Kathee! Congratulations Ricaaaa!! You know what else makes me sad?

I might not make it to the Vista end of the year banquet because I have class till 7 and they're leaving at 6...without me. How sad :( I hope our lecture doesn't last 3 hours because that would suck ALSO I'm missing a noteboard posting. Gross. I hate you procrastination.

I'm running on approximately 3-4 hours of sleep so I'm definitely gonna crash on Sunday morning. It's Spring Banquet today and I keep mistyping because I lack sleep! UGH! But that's okay. First I have to go to my brother's graduation. Yay Alex! High school graduation already. I'd blog about mine but I can't. I'm really proud of him, he got 3 awards last night, one of them being for AP Calc AND he's number 4 in the class. I can't wait to see him get his diploma and stuff. I don't think I'm gonna cry though, too tired for that hahaha. So yes, today's a busy day. Despite the lack of sleep and the tiredness, I know that He's there guiding us all this weekend. Now I'm gonna list things... like Meechy does because 1. I don't have time and 2. I'm lazy.

- This little light of mine I'm gonna let it shine.
- All for You
- Procrastination will rear its' ugly head tomorrow.
- I'm so excited...
-That's an understatement.
- Thank you and thank You.
- Stronger shoulders.
- Let's do this.
- Week 10, I'm not ready.
- You think you know, but you have NO idea.
- Comfort in laughter... or at least I hope.
- What a journey.
- Friends are awesome.
- Yo'okayyyyy the end.

kinda but not really... this close to crying though which is pretty close. With the end of the year approaching, I feel STRESSED. How do the older students do it? How do YOU do it? Yes you, the big bad junior or senior who's reading my blog instead of studying probably and still manages to get everything done. If you have an answer I'd like to know because I really feel all this emotion building up inside and I'm ready to burst. Ahhhh! I notice that I tend to blog when I'm feeling the most emotional.

Stronger shoulders please.
I lean on You. Thank You for the pick-me-up's and the pick-me-uppers. Thank You for surrounding me with people who care for me and love me, especially during times when I feel I'm at my lowest. You bring me back up again. So do you.

I just finished planning my tentative sophomore year fall quarter schedule. Me? A second year? You must be joking! Anyway it TENTATIVELY includes: Social Science 3A (some techno. req. for the school of social sciences, Intro. to Social Psych., Education 50 (sorry I can't take it with you at 9:30 Kirs because I have Social Science 3A at that time), and because I'm used to taking 16 since I feel like 12 is too little, I'm also taking Intro to Ling. ( I don't even know if that counts for the math req. in social sciences but I wanted to try taking it anyway). Yes, that is my schedule. Hopefully not all of it is filled up tomorrow. I really don't feel like looking for replacement classes.

09, mighty fine. I love my first year LOG sisters and brothers. They are some of the most AWESOME people you will ever meet in your life, seriously. I'm amazed by our growth as individuals and as a group every single day. We'll need to grow a lot more to fill the shoes that this year's seniors (and the future '07 and '08 seniors) have (and will have) left behind. I'm glad I've found a group of people my age who I can genuinely feel comfortable with. I love spending time with them for real, lots of laughter and never a dull moment. I look forward to our future together. Yay! Thanks for today yo'okay.

Blogging relieves lots of stress. Wow I feel kind of at ease even though I have an 8-10 page paper to write.

Did I mention that I haven't started?

It's "only" a rough draft. Whatever. My rough drafts = my final drafts. Yes, I am one of those people.

Tomorrow right after class I have to go back to L.A. for my brother's baccaleaureate mass, not that I don't want to go because I do but I know that I'm probably not gonna get home till 9pm and then who knows if I'm actually gonna do my paper since I have to wake up at 9 in the morning and go to his graduation and then head back to Irvine.

Please pray for me, for you, for them, and for all the people who are struggling right now. Thank you!

P.S. Oh yeah, before you hear it from someone else... i.e. Bellamay (tell the whole world my life's story why don't you?! hahah jk)... why yes I did knock over a caution wet floor sign at La Salsa today when I opened the door and yes it was obvious and yes Toni, Penney, Bernie, and Bellamay were all there behind me to witness it and laugh. I'm clumsy.