"I see a generation rising up to take their place with selfless Faith." - Congratulations on another successful Benefit Concert, Liwanag . You make Liwanag Family Ministry so so proud. Thank you for constantly reminding us what/who it's really all about. Continue shining & being that Light ♥
posted by anna liza at 12:24 PM
Tuesday, November 09, 2010
After work today I spent some time going through old Liwanag emails in my inbox and I came across some of the emails that I sent out to core and to LOG members. Those emails were so full of hope and love. You can tell that they were written with care and more importantly, with deep, genuine passion. As a servant-leader in Liwanag, my entire heart was consumed by my love for this family and my love for God. A simple message reminding LOG'ers to bring money for Benefit Concert t-shirts conveyed the most heart-felt feelings. Those messages were written by a girl who let her heart be her guide; a girl whose life was dictated not by what was popular or what was expected of her but by her Faith in God.
This weekend was awesome. I couldn't have asked for a better weekend. I spent it with family and friends whom I love very much. I was expecting this weekend to lead into an awesome week but I've been so out of it. The worst part is that I'm so bad at hiding my feelings so people can see right through me. I can't even count the number of times I've had co-workers ask me what's wrong or why I'm not my "cheery" self or why I'm so down... and I can't explain it. Well, maybe I can. God has been nothing but good to me. I'm so so blessed. I have a steady job and I'm approaching the end of my probation period, I'm making enough money to replenish my savings account again, my family is healthy, we're all working and contributing to the family expenses, we're most likely traveling to the Philippines for the first time next December, I have amazing friends who check up on me every once in a while, I have a caring & loving boyfriend who continues to love me even when I am stubborn and selfish and who says "whatever you want" in response to my question, "what should we get/eat/do?" haha
But I'm experiencing one of my slumps. I can't help but compare my present self to where I want to be in the future. I'm paying my dues but man, sometimes I just want to get there already...wherever "there" is. It doesn't help that I'm currently assigned to an IT dept... and guess what? I'm pretty sure I can cross IT off of my list of potential occupations. It may pay well but it's not me. It's not what I wanna do. It's not what I'm passionate about. Another life lesson that I've learned lately is that sometimes in life, you have to do what you don't want to do. You're not always going to love what you do but if you're patient and if you have Faith, good things will happen. I have to remind myself to trust in God's time rather than my own.
The security guard saw me yesterday and said, "hey, don't lose your Sonshine...I've seen young people like you who start off working and have all the cheeriness and enthusiasm in the world and then a few months later, it's gone. I lost my sunshine awhile ago and I'm trying to get it back. Don't lose yours." It wasn't something I was expecting to hear at the moment but it was definitely something I needed to hear. I have to put on that happy face. My other co-worker told me that I'm only allowed one sad day per year and if I don't bring back her happy, cheery Anna, she's going to hunt me down lol. I know this feeling will go away but in the mean time, prayers please. Thanks my friends! I'm praying for you all too.