hey janice, meechy & cressa!! i'm the oldest panda now! :0









halloween will be spent studying. HARDCORE. ALL DAY. starting... soon.

Labels: halloween, immac, mac, pandas, spice girls

we are RIDICULOUS...

but i like it hahah.

study study study! let's study!

warning: teenybopper post...

I REALLY WANT THE BACKSTREET BOYS' NEW ALBUM! LIKE REALLY! (dude... hot album cover too!)


that will be my end of the week reward for having finished my midterms.

everyone always says it... and they're right. there's never enough time.

i like this type love.

praying for everyone with midterms still. yay!

Labels: backstreet boys, spice girls

does surveys the night before her midterm?
oh yeah me.

1. How old will you be in 3 birthdays?
23

2. Do you think you’ll be married by then?
highly doubt it. education first fools! :)

3. What do you look forward to most in the next 2 months?
Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays!

4. Who was the last person you called?
brenton

5. Who was the last person to leave you a voicemail?
"yo it's me juss callin' to say wassup..."- joe

6. Who was the last person to text you?
erweirdo - "there's a little girl here at souplantation that looks like u cept shes messican LoLz"

7. Who was the last person you hugged?
brenton

8. What were you doing at midnight last night?
reading my abnormal psych book in the comforts of my bed at home home

11. What were you doing at 11am today?
on the road home from brunch

12. How many states have you visited?
a handful i'd say

13. If you could be anywhere right now, where would it be?
at home home.

14. Do you prefer shoes, socks, or bare feet?
socks? i don't know. no preference.

15. Are you a social person?
for the most part, depends on my mood.

16. What was the last thing you drank?
agua

17. Favorite ice cream ?
this is a toughy. banana ice cream! chocolate chip cookie dough! chocolate malted crunch.

18. What is your favorite dessert?
frozen yogurt or pizookies. yum.

19. Whats your favorite color?
pink & purple (yes it's quite stereotypical of me).

20. What kind of jelly do you put on your PB and J’s?
i can do without the PB. i don't eat deadly sandwiches.

21. Do you like coffee?
no

22. How many glasses of water a day do you drink on average?
A LOT? 4-5 bottles? i pee a lot. and cry a lot too... haha

23. What do you drink in the morning?
water

25. Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed?
the colder side.

26. Do you know how to play poker?
my stats teacher in h.s. taught us how to but i don't remember.

27. Whats so good about Fridays?
no school

28. Any plans for this week?
2 midterms, LOG, work, fieldwork, classes, etc.

29. Do you eat out or at home more often?
in irvine i eat out a lot more than i should.

30. How big is your TV?
no tv in my room but our living room tv is pretty big.

31. Ever stolen a street sign?
no

32. Do you keep a piggy bank?
no but i have 3 coin purses full of coins ready to be put into a piggy bank..

33. What kind of camera do you have?
no camera :(

34. Have you ever been in an ambulance?
no

35. Do you prefer an ocean or a pool?
a pool bc i'd drown in an ocean

36. Do you prefer a window seat in the car
YES! i don't like sitting in the middle.

37. Do you know how to drive a stick shift?
the question should be... do you know how to drive? lol jk. NO.

38. What is your favorite thing to spend money on?
food

39. Do you wear any jewelry 24/7?
my immac ring and my religious bracelet.

41. Can you roll your tounge?
i think so?

42. Who is the funniest person you know?
that can be a lot of people... but i'd say angie just because i laugh every time i'm around her.

43. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?
yes.

44. What is the main ring tone on your phone?
silence which is why i miss so many calls.

45. Do you still have clothes from when you were little?
yeah AND i have a carebear snowsuit from when i was two. i wish i still fit in it.

46. What is the color of your bedroom wall?
yellow (at home home)

47. Do you shut off the water when you brush your teeth?
sometimes.

48. Are you crushing on someone right now?
wouldn't you like to know? you probably do haha.
if his name is zac, you are...partially wrong. refer to #4 & 7.

49. Do you currently hate someone?
no sir.

TIME TO STUDY!


it is 10:16 am and i am at my new home away from home, the study lounge! forget the library. just kidding, the library is cool too but it has been replaced. as i sit here, attempting to study or more like CRAM for the next 7 or so hours, lots of thoughts are floating around inside my head. streams of consciousness begin? i hope that guy behind me isn't reading my entry maybe i should dim the screen there i just dimmed the screen i love my mac it is a blessing and a curse sure, i use it to type outline notes but it also gives me direct access to 3 of my favorite weaknesses: facebook, myspace and AIM i wish i had a case to protect my laptop oh yeah i bought one at the bookstore today for twenty bucks but since tomorrow is the halloween sale i plan on returning this case today and buying one for 25% off tomorrow i'm glad i got to visit my twin at work boooo i'm not gonna work enough hours this week if i have all these midterms speaking of midterms i should start studying this has been a long enough study break & happy birthday dad!

Labels: brenton, csl, mac, midterms, survey

"People with the Type A behavior pattern are impatient, competitive, and aggressive. They feel rushed under pressure. They keep one eye glued to the clock. They are prompt and often arrive early for appointments. They walk, talk and eat rapidly. They grow restless when others work slowly."

that is ME. i will stop. no more.

i will stop stressing... after studying my abnormal psych book tonight, i learned that stress leads to cancer. i don't want that. i need to stop worrying so much. why do i do this to myself? why?!

Labels: abormal psych, stress, type A, worrying

that's all you really ever get to see unless i've let you in. lately i've used this blog to write about how i'm feeling on the inside. to be honest, i won't even understand a majority of what i've written months from now. but it's a way of letting you know what's going on without entirely letting you know. go figure.
the reason i'm stressed out so much... as a result, i watched "the office" with my brother. it was funny. he thinks i'm weird cause it was only my third time watching it ever in my life. "that show's only one hour... why can't you watch an hour of tv?" maybe i'd watch tv if i had one in my room?

i'm so different from my 15 year old self and yet so similar.

mountains out of mole hills = story of my life.

anyway, another weekend at home & another weekend to re-evaluate my life & my priorities. who am i putting first?

we're not the same people we thought we were & that takes some adjusting.

superficial updates for the sake of updating:
- i found my first strand of white hair this past week...actually brenton did. it's gross. ugh. dumo says it's cause of stress? that or it's a sign of old age.
- i've had my new macbook for the past 3 weeks. it's awesome :) i love it. yay.
- i also like studying at the new study lounge at the student center. bellamay said i used to live at the library but now i think i'm gonna live at the study lounge. maybe i'll camp out there during finals.
- i want kirs to teach me how to put on make up hahah.
- i'm weirded out by being a third year sometimes.
- banana ice cream from strickland's is just as good as banana ice cream from coldstone.
- at fieldwork at madison elementary i have to wear a nametag that says "Ms. Anna" and all the little third graders call me that... it reminds me of meechy lol.
- happy early birthday dad!

to do:
- get my _______ yeah you know.
- make a collage, frame it, and put it up in my room
- study study study... for my classes & eventually for the GRE's too HAHAHAHA. i'm gonna win! jk best friend :P
- get an internship.
- look my age (seriously. i want to.)
- stop being a bum.
- apply for new jobs... so that i can do other fun things.
- work on my resume ( i need will & jamie to help meeeee)
- learn how to put make up on properly (like kirs lol)
- be less passive.
- talk the talk & walk the walk. whatever that means.

ok study time. peace! prayers :D

Labels: banana ice cream, brenton, csl, dad, dumo, g.r.e, kirs, mac, madison, make up, makeup, strickland's, the office, white hair

gp's playlist had this song & i can relate.



i feel so frustrated right now because no matter how hard i try, i can't keep up... with friends, with family, with school, with life... i constantly keep falling short...of people's expectations, of my own expectations. am i trying hard enough? am i putting in enough effort? am i doing everything wholeheartedly? am i keeping You in the center? i want to give all of myself to everything i do but it's hard. when you spread yourself too thin you're bound to break apart. i always feel like i'm disappointing someone every time i make a decision. even for the little things. i wish i could be at multiple places at the same time. i don't like making anyone sad. (i also have the guiltiest conscience ever & if anyone is mad at me, i will cave.)

realization: i need to take care of ME sometimes.

talking to you helps and knowing that even if you don't see the same familiar faces every day, those faces that you miss are faces of people who are constantly praying for you.

i'm the biggest kj in life & i wish i wasn't.

when i worry, i stay quiet.

i'd rather not be reminded please...

midterm season! good luck on midterms. prayers.

happy four best friend :)

Labels: brenton, me, whitney houston

and through these crazy times,
it's you, it's You, you make me sing
You're every line, You're every word, You're everything.

this song is perhaps the best way to describe my life at this very moment.

what's wrong & what's right? everything and nothing at the same time. is that even possible? oh it is. i believe it is.

i'm moving along, trying to keep my sights set on You but too often i get sidetracked and i feel lost.

i think i've had a lot on my mind lately but i've picked up the habit of tossing these thoughts in the backburner. repression works wonders.

but then again, i can never completely get rid of them. i know i can't until i confront every single thing that's bothering me.

progress & growth are supposed to be good right?

i seriously AM a crybaby. when i'm happy, i cry. when i'm sad, i cry. and for every emotion i feel in between, i cry.

DON'T BE A HARD ROCK WHEN YOU REALLY ARE A GEM.
anna liza, do not forget that you are worth more than you think. you deserve to be happy. you are never a disappointment. you are loved. you are love. you reflect Him. you are beautiful.

someone needs to drill that into my head.

so much to get done and all i can do is blog. i want to sleep.

thank you for dinner and for the advice. let's not wait till the water runs dry... (:
thank you for dinner also and for always taking care of me. i don't know what i'd do without you.




... till it happens to you.

it's the beginning of another wonderful LOG family adventure. yesterday's meeting was families! yay families! i'm glad i get to serve alongside people like holly & julian. this is gonna be a good year. mmm pizookies.

sorry for leaving you hanging for a few days. life gets in the way of blogging.

i hate how i always cry during power of your love... you'd think it would get old after 2 years.

the art of "feeling good". frances gave me a book called "the feeling good handbook." it's supposed to help you overcome depression (don't worry i don't have that), conquer anxiety (be worried, i have lots of that) and enjoy greater intimacy (that could use some work too). i realized after reading a few pages that i am guilty of suffering from many cognitive distortions... including the ones i've learned about in class. i often am guilty of magnification, absolutist (black & white) thinking, and overgeneralization, among other things. it's sad. i need to improve my negative attitude or i'll go through life being pathetic. thanks frances. i'm gonna read it soon. i think i need to.

aside from that life is... growth. constant growth. i'm learning something new everyday. yesterday i learned i assume too much & assuming is bad.

i like talking to the oldies. it makes me feel better.

when i heard power of your love i closed my eyes and imagined what it was like hearing that song as a freshman and it made me cry even more.

yay st. thomas aquinas, patron saint of students. i'll need your help this year.

note to self: don't sell yourself short, don't give up, and be yourself.

i'm hungry. i start fieldwork today. that should be fun! interacting with kids is fun.

goodbye.

ugh i hate studying. i lack motivation.

the little things are irritating me again.

"Remember Jesus Christ"... the priest today said that the best way to remember Him is to be grateful. By being grateful for who we are and for the lives we live, we give praise to Him who created us, who loves us, & who walks with us. It's a way of showing others that regardless of the struggles that we come across, we value our lives because they're gifts from Him...we're gifts from Him.

I pray Lord God that when someone asks me how I am, I respond with an "I'm grateful" rather than an "I'm exhausted, I'm tired, I'm stressed, I'm okay, I'm alright."


"Grant me, O Lord my God, a mind to know you, a heart to seek you, wisdom to find you, conduct pleasing to you, faithful perseverance in waiting for you, and a hope of finally embracing you."
- Saint Thomas Aquinas

i wish i didn't feel this way but i do. booo.

let it slide.

although one day i should stop being a pushover.

i was talking to cristina yesterday... "they're additions to the family, not substitutions"... that's why no one can ever replace who you are and who you've been to me and to others.

i better study while i'm at home. oh school.

this is a quick post.

but looking back on the past two weeks... can i just say that i'm seriously excited for this year, no matter how many units i'm taking, no matter how many books i have to read, no matter how much work i have to do, no matter how much i have to sacrifice, no matter how scared i am... it's EXCITING because of...

Liwanag!!!!!!!
PASS.
newbies.
freshies.
oldies.
friends.
family.
LIFE.
NEWNESS!

AMAZING.

SuperNixon2 (4:18:50 PM): anna you aren't so old but you are growing up

there's another anna. i'm gonna have to change my name. haha. but not really.

since when do I, annaaaa lizaaaa the "first year" who lost her keys like 3 times in a year, got lost in a parking lot structure, made other people make decisions for her... have to play the "mom" in a skit? i mean seriously. it was weird how i was probably the oldest person in my bible skit group last night. oldies, where are you?

i still need to work on my public speaking skills.

sorry for waking you up at 12am last night to tell you that your old high school was being shut down. it could've waited till today but it was breaking news & i wanted to be the one to break it to you. sorry again for your loss. DM will be missed.

thank you for the surprises! i love them...especially the keychain :D you're my inspiration, even when you're far away. praying for you always. it's an honor to take after you.

i got it from my mama ;] hahah

GO FOR IT! connect four. jk. i believe in you. can you make my dream a reality? please? thanks.

you've been swamped with life. sorry for not picking up all the phone calls but i appreciate being checked up on. i really do. thanks for caring so much.

i like our lunch dates. thanks for listening to me :)

sleepover soon? :D it's YOUR year.

hi twin.

i'm ALWAYS gonna need you! don't forget it. don't move away yet. i can never outgrow this friendship. you made me who i am today. REALLY. thank you.

I LOVE YOU TOO! :P bully bullyyyyy.

i'm proud of you & i'm excited for you.

i love you & i love You. thanks for this year.

man my blogs suck. until next time, peace out.
let's study!

i've written so many blog drafts and decided not to post them. maybe later. i suck at blogging now. really.

planners work.
still need to drop a class.
need to stop resorting to drops when i feel like my GPA is on the line.
get a high GPA this quarter to boost my current one.

I CARE!

too much sometimes...

this quarter i want to make a difference.
become more involved.
step up! and step out!
know my limits.
internship?
research?
PCN?
tutor?
peer advise?
make friends with my professors?
network?
look into what career i want to pursue (will & jamie need to help with this)
not be so shy.
not be so indecisive.
not let people walk all over me.
make the most out of my time left in uci.
KEEP IN TOUCH.

i look at so many people and see how involved they are. i want to be involved too! i want to graduate knowing that i've done my best & tried many things...at least once.
there's SOOOOO MUCH I WANT TO DO!!! and sooo little time. 2 years left. can i do it?

aside from that, guess how many units i've done so far???
117 FOOLS!!!! after this quarter i'll have completed 133.
junior status is 90!! and senior status is 135!

skjghsadkjghskadjgksagh WOW!!!!!

i'm in awe.
third year, be nice.


sorry i talked about school this entire blog but that's what's been on my mind lately.

speaking of school, nothing can happen if i don't "get up, get out and get somethin'..." time to read!

every day He surprises me. He manages to make a masterpiece out of even the dullest colors. regardless of how i feel about myself, i am strengthened in knowing how He feels about me & by the fact that He believes in me. as long as i lift everything up to Him, as long as i let go of my own insecurities & let Him take hold of me, as long as i disregard my own plans & follow His, as long as i completely surrender myself to His will, everything will be good & i will be good because He is good.

praise God for new opportunities to relight my fire.
praise God for new opportunities to remember my "Yes."
praise God for new opportunities to see His face.
praise God for new opportunities to walk into the light.

i don't know where i would be without You. all i know is that without You, i'd be without Love. thank You for the Love.

i'm tired. i think i'm gonna sleep soon so that i can wake up early to read.

i think i don't like playing games because i'm always under the impression that i'll make my team lose just by being a part of it. it's pathetic. i know.

when will i outgrow this?

although i'm not a freshman anymore, once in a while i catch myself wanting to crawl back into the comforts of that same awkward shell & gradually stepping away from the very same thing i was drawn to. i don't know why i do it but if you've had as much practice as i've had, it's not difficult to revert back to being an introvert.

fighting it.

praying for you.

so this is it.

reminders:
stop being stuck in the past.
shake it off.

put on a happy face.

it's first meeting today!!

liwanag: the next generation.
haha :]

it's good to be home even if it's just for a night because i slept at 10:30 last night and just woke up. it feels wonderful! :) i feel so well-rested and ready to start october.

it's tha first of the monthhhhh...

i can't believe it. this academic year is gonna go by quickly. i know it is.

you know the song "now that you're near" makes me want to cry when i sing it and one time i actually did cry when singing it... even though it's a fast song. the lyrics get to me. now that You're near, everything is different, everything's so different Lord, i know I'm not the same, my life You've changed, i wanna be with You, i wanna be with You.

yay i don't have class until 7 tonight. hopefully it doesn't last until 10:00 because i don't want to be in class till 10... that's the time i'd want to sleep.

yayyyyy first meeting of the year tomorrow!!! is it me or am i getting old? i'm an upperclasswoman? what the heck. if someone starts calling me old i'm gonna be sad.

i did this for my second year so might as well do it for my third year.
reasons why i like being a third year so far:
* i'm starting to get comfortable in my own skin
* serving LOG in a different & exciting new way
* running into people i know on ring road!!!!! :) that's a major plus because it makes me feel happy!
* finally experiencing the STUDENT CENTER!!!!
* 09 lunches!!!!
* taking classes that actually have to do with my major and not breadth requirements.
* the opportunity to take care of other people... especially people younger than me
* living in an apt.
* one year closer to wearing the cap & gown!!!!!!!

that's all i got for now. i'll add on later. okay have a good monday! see you soon!